Amber Grubenmann

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You Like Him, But What Will Your Friends and Family Think?

Uncategorized Jan 11, 2024

Sometimes in dating, our ego can get in the way of connection.

One way that this can show up is when we start worrying about what other people think about the person we are dating.

Maybe we go on a date with somebody and they don't quite match the type that we were looking for.

Maybe their style is completely different than ours, or maybe their job is not something that our parents would be impressed by.

We start to consider other people's opinions as a factor for whether we should start a relationship with that person.

The issue with this is that it takes us out of our intuition and our emotions.

The number one skill that you need to learn in dating is how to tune into how you feel. When you can do that, you will be guided towards what's right for you.

You might not believe that because you think that when you trusted your feelings, you dated the worst guys.

But actually in those situations, you were not listening to your feelings. You were not noticing how confused, anxious, and uncertain you felt.

When we're not noticing those feelings, we tend to go in the wrong direction, away from an exclusive relationship with somebody awesome.

Similarly, when our ego gets involved and we start to consider factors like what other people think, it's another version of not listening to how we feel.

When I bring this up, a lot of people think I'm saying they should date someone who they’re not attracted to.

That's not what I'm saying.

I'm just saying you might be missing out on a connection with someone that you are really attracted to because you care about what other people think.

And you might be surprised by who you're attracted to if you actually pay attention to how your body feels more than you pay attention to what that person was supposed to look like before you even met them.

My challenge to you is to notice when you’re having a great time with somebody and then suddenly you picture what your friends or family would say.

Notice that thought coming from your ego, and then tune back into how you actually feel about that. Does that actually bother you? Or do you just feel bothered by the fact that it would bother someone else?

How do you feel in your body when you’re around this person?

Do you feel like you want to move towards them? Do you feel something drawing you in?

Or are you genuinely feeling a no?

And bring it back to what you actually feel rather than what you think other people will think.


Want to go From Dating To Exclusive? Make sure you get on the waitlist for the next program. Click here to learn more. 

This content was originally published on the Women's Dating and Confidence Podcast. Listen on Apple Podcasts or Spotify



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