Amber Grubenmann

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Advice For Introvert- Extrovert Couples And Relationships

Uncategorized Aug 14, 2019

In today's video I'll be answering a listener question about how to make an introvert/extrovert relationship work.

By the way, they totally can work! It's just so important to understand the other person, who has different needs and desires than you. 

Here are a few tips to help you out:

1.) Communication is KEY.

As an introvert, I remember explaining to my boyfriend: "Just because I want to spend time alone, doesn't mean I don't like you!"

Sometimes the extroverted person in the relationship feels like the introverted person wants time AWAY from them. In reality, the introverted person just wants time WITH themselves.

That's a huge distinction. As the introvert, make sure you clearly communicate this to your partner.

2.) Learn how to create healthy boundaries.

In the beginning of the relationship I had a tough time setting boundaries because I didn't want to hurt the person. 

Overtime I realized that behavior was actually hurting the long-term potential of the relationship. If you don't honor your innate needs you will start to feel resentful towards the person. 

A very challenging boundary to set as the introvert is this: "Just because I have free time doesn't mean I automatically want to spend all of it with you." Ouch!

Can you imagine how it feels to hear that on the other side? 

We need to be conscious of how we communicate these things. Tell them how much you love the time you do spend together, and how you also value time to yourself. 

3.) Space is GOOD for your relationship. 

Many people today believe that a relationship is all about connecting with the other person as much as possible. 

As an introvert you can communicate how valuable space in a relationship can really be. 

Space allows desire to reveal itself. 

Space allows you to miss the other person and develop yourself outside of the relationship so you can bring more back to the relationship. 

 

Thanks so much for watching/ reading!

Love, 

Amber

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